For some people, they keep EVERYTHING given to them by their friends, loved ones and family. I, myself am like that. I have kept every letters, sweet nothings, messages and sentimental stuff given by my friends and loved ones.

I kept them in a paper bag that is already filled with those stuff and 2 large envelopes containing huge birthday cards given by my friends.

For some reason, I like to keep them because it gives proof that a friendship or a relationship happened. I dunno, whenever I feel nostalgic over something or I just want to simply reminisce over the things that happened to me during my teenage years, I just get it and start to read them again. Some of it may contain happy messages and some of are sad, goodbye messages. 

It also gives me some sort of relieving those experiences over again. PLUS, I have at least one letter from my past girlfriends and letters coming from my crushes and friends. It also has a gift wrap containing a super short message from my best friend.

SENTIMENTAL STUFF. I know every person has a least one that are very sentimental to them. :)

There are two types of person when it comes to sharing something. (1) this person shares his/her experiences, problems, challenges and basically almost everything that happened to him/her to everyone either via text, chat, blog, twitter, facebook and such while the (2) other one, keeps everything to himself/herself.

I believe that I fall on the first type of person. I share ALMOST everything to my friends specially to my close and trusted friends. However, there are certain things that I encounter that I’d rather keep it to myself because I believe that it would be better this way.

This certain thing that I am about to open up or share at my blog post. I believe that I need to let it out or burst it out so that I’d be able to release my deep sigh that I’ve  been keeping for weeks or so.

Most of you may already know what this is about, if ever you are reading my tumblr page then you might really know who it is, since I don’t talk about other things these past few months.

So here it goes…
There are times wherein I just want to give everything up, I feel so unappreciated, the efforts I made to make her feel special, the efforts I did to make her recognize me. I know what she’ll tell me if ever I told her this, she’ll just tell me that she did not make me do the things I did and that it is on my own action. So it really doesn’t matter if she appreciated it or not. A little gesture of thanks or appreciation is pretty much okay with me. I don’t need a payback or return of gratitude, all I want is that you somehow acknowledge the things I make to make you feel special.  Please don’t tell me that you don’t know how to do those things, I know you can because I’ve seen it. 

Whenever I do or say something sweet or something nice to you. I get no reaction, no comment or anything. What happened to the “AYIIIIIEEE” or “ANG KORNI MO NAMAN”. Its as if you act like you saw nothing or if you are to say something you always end up saying “OKAY” or “IKAW BAHALA” or “WHAAAAT?” or “NYEEE” or “WHATEVER”. It feels like a rejection or a slap to my face. 

I still can’t figure out if you are trying to avoid me or you are pushing yourself away from me or you are just blocking everything I did. Its so damn hard to read your actions, your gestures, and as yourself.

I think I am already nearing my limit or maybe not. This Job that I took, is maybe what I need to somehow stay apart from you, maybe we both need this. I need this because I know it would make me a whole lot better and discover my the new side of me. You need this so that you’d be able to think a lot better and see if you really need me in your life, if not then so be it. 

ALL I REALLY ASK FOR IS SOME CLARIFICATION, A SIT-DOWN TALK OF EVERYTHING, LAY EVERYTHING DOWN THE TABLE AND TALK ABOUT IT.
but knowing you, I know you want to avoid all of these. Yeah, I know you this much and it really is hard for me just to keep my mouth shut and just deal with this alone.

As I am writing this blog post, my tears fell down.

I may not know what’s going on about us but you can have my word that I am never going to leave your side. You’ll always have me to back you up no matter what happens.

You’ll always have me, to love you and to care for you no matter what.

As far as I remember, this is my very first Valentine’s Day that I celebrated with someone. Meaning, going out on a ‘date’ or having dinner and spending Hearts day with someone you ♥ .

So this is how my Valentine’s day went…

I sort of tried to surprise her by going to her school at around 5:30pm since her Tuesday class is up until 6pm. Around 6:10pm, I was already wondering why she hasn’t texted me yet. So I asked her sister if they are dismissed already and she said not yet. So I waited and waited until 6:30pm. By that time, I heard her voice approaching the place where I parked my car. So I called her and asked her, where she is and told her that I am at her school.

To my surprise, she forgot that I told her that I am going to her school and that she already has plans that night. I still tried to keep myself calm and cool so that it would not ruin my night. 

Since my so-called surprise visit failed big time. HAHAHA. I tried to make an impromptu plan B. First I told her that before she decides whether to go with me or with her friends, I’ll give you my ‘surprises’ first.

Left: Marks and Spencer Paper Bag containing Boy Bawang
Center: Bouquet of Red Roses
Upper Right: Box of homemade cookies
Lower Right: Homemade Blueberry Cheesecake 

First of was the roses, when I gave it to her, I can’t really explain her reactions but I’ll never forget that face when I saw it. After giving the roses, I gave her the Paper bag containing Boy bawang. Why did I give boy bawang? its because she always say that I’m a korni person. I make korni jokes and banats once in a while. HAHAHA! and by giving that proves that I am really korni. HAHAHA! 

The homemade cookies that I made and that’s what written on it.

The Blueberry Cheesecake that I made also. (looks yummy right.)

After giving the paper bag, I told her to go inside the car to see what those boxes contain, after seeing what was inside she asked me where I bought those. I told her, that I didn’t bought them, I made them. YES, I made the cookies and the blueberry cheesecake. 

After giving my Valentine’s gift to her, she told me to wait for a while because she has something to get from her friend at her dorm. So while waiting, I was really nervous if she’ll go with me or not. When she returned, she told me let’s go. I asked where, she said at her house to drop the gifts and to change attire. 

When we got there, we decided to go to Alabang to eat dinner at Bonchon, but decided not to eat at Bonchon anymore because its full of people and there’s a long line. We decided to eat at Burger King instead after eating we strolled for a while and decided to buy Serenitea before going home. 

My valentine’s night may be simple but I’m really really happy I got to spend it with her and for me, that’s the perfect gift I got that day. :”>

163rd Commencement Exercises.
De La Salle University College Graduation.

After studying for four years from May 2007 up until December 2011. I am finally a College Graduate. I took up BS Computer Science during my 1st and 2nd year of college then I shifted to AB Psychology because I liked it more and I am more good at it. Who would’ve thought that I’ll be able to graduate almost on time. Graduation is SO WORTH IT. From the hell week that I get to experience during my OJT, Thesis and Loaded School work to the fun and formative years of my college that I get to experience living in Manila, going to clubs, which I only experienced twice, partying all night long. 
I MUST SAY THAT MY COLLEGE DAYS IS FULL OF EXPERIENCE AND I WAS ABLE TO EXPERIENCE IT ON A NEW ENVIRONMENT. 

After finishing my undergraduate course, I need to find work soon so I’ll be able to earn and save money for myself and for the future ahead of me. I would still want to go to school maybe after a year or two. I would want to take up masters on either Industrial Psychology or Counseling Psychology. Still haven’t made up my mind but I do want to take up either of the two.

On the other side of things, These past few weeks have been an up and down for me. I know that I don’t share stuff as often as before. I can’t say anything so far because I still don’t know what to put or what to label but as far as how I feel, I guess what is happening between us is better than nothing. I get to enjoy her company which is what I have always wanted. Things certainly changed between us. Its just like a dream come true, somehow.

” I won’t give up on us, even if the skies get rough… ” - Jason Mraz, I won’t give up. I really love this part of the lyrics because I am not the type of person that would give up besides 4 years passed us by but still I still didn’t give up. What is Desperate? JOOOOOKE. hahahaha. 

HAPPY NEW YEAR GUYS. :>

Who would’ve thought that my 2011 would be a blast.
My last year of study, the end of my undergraduate life, the end of my so-called teen year, the end of my lonely and sad life. However, I shall welcome my new year with a blast, the start of my working life, entering the young adult stage and welcoming my new year with the one I love the most —- yes, I spent my new year beside my love one and my family.  Should I ask for more? NO. Welcoming 2012 with the one you love and your family is probably one of the best thing that happened to me. Who would’ve thought that it would happen this early. :>

Thank you to my friends and family who were there for me during 2011, I know you’ll still be here this 2012 and the next year and the next. You guys made me happy during my down and hard moments in my life. What would I do without you guys. :)

Thank you to my bestest best friend (whaaat? hahaha) for making me happy these past few months. Spending your Christmas vacation with me and spending new year with me. :”>. You don’t know how happy I am because you are around. I really really Love you so much. Cheers to the greatest relationship I have ever had. :D Thank you for the 2011 memories and I hope we’d have more memories to share this 2012 and the years after that. I so love you Baby Girl. :p 

akala ko di ako mapapaiyak pero ngayon lang nag sink in sakin

4 months may seem short para masabi ko na napalapit na ako sa pinsan at pamangkin niya. Di ko naman akalain na mapapadalas ang pagkikita kita namin. Akala ko after ng Elite tapos na di ko na ulit sila makakasama. Dun ako nagkamali ehh.

Kung hindi dahil kay Ate Avi, feeling ko wala pa din nangyayari sakin, walang special sa 2011 ko. Hindi lang ako napalapit sa kanya kundi pati na rin sa pamilya niya. Sobrang mamimiss ko lang sila alam ko na hindi pa eto yun last na pagkikita kita namin kasi magkikita kita pa din kami sa Canada, US at Philippines. 

Sobrang salamat lang talaga sa inyo. Mamimiss ko talaga ang tawa, ingay, kulit, kwentuhan at gala kasama kayo. 

December 10-11, 2011 Starbucks Tagaytay.
This may mean nothing to the most of you, but it means a lot to me.